Sunday, May 03, 2009

I am retired.

Well, this is a weird thing to announce, for some reason.  I am retired as of last Thursday or more accurately a stay-at-home-Mom.  It's weird because it was always something that I really wanted to do but never really thought would happen.  Well it has and I must say that I am little freaked out.  Everyone keeps saying, "Are you excited?"  "You must be so looking forward to this time!". Don't get me wrong, I am so excited but honestly I'm a little embarrassed.  The Hovaters are going to be poor, poor, poor but the truth is that we should be able to swing this financially with some discipline and that makes me self-conscious.  It is such a privileged place in our society to be a SAHM and I want to be mindful of those that can't or don't want to.  It's not for everybody and really I may get 6 months into this and decide it's not for me.  Mom's of all decisions should be honored for their "Momdum".  Also, I kind of feel like it's a club, an exclusive club that Mom's that don't stay at home with their kids, or kidless people for that matter, aren't invited to be a part of.  That makes me sad and also fired up at the same time! I'm sorry that I'm rambling some and maybe even offending someone or two.  That is not my intention, it's just me processing what this means for me, our family and our girls.  Because I still think it is very important for there to be a 'me' beyond a Momma to our sweet girls.  Wow, this is not where I wanted this post to go!  I was planning on speaking about making this time to be about memories and not me shooshing them to go play while I slave away in the kitchen or fold laundry.   I guess we will figure all of that out over time.  I guess that I just want people to know that I while I am so excited to spend every day making memories with my girls, I am also taking this position in our lives with a very heavy heart, realizing the privilege and be so thankful for that while being very thoughtful at the responsibility that I am taking on.  

10 comments:

Sarah said...

You are going to have some sweet, wonderful days with your daughters but I won't lie that it will be hard work to find balance between being consumed by their lives and finding a life of your own. Try and find oppurtunities to get out of the house by yourself and times with just you and Steven. If you need to have an adult conversation during the day, don't hesitate to give me a call. It speaks highly of you to recognize that not everyone is in the same lifestage and to not exclude those who are not where you are. And don't worry about the poor thing...your girls will remember you being there not what things you could buy for them...but I realize that's not always easy to think about in our consumeristic society. Thanks for speaking what's on your heart!

Jesse Faris said...

Good thoughts. I especially liked your comment about all moms being recognized for their "momdum" Agreed. And I recognize YOU, because you are one hard-working Momma, whether in an office or at home!

Allison said...

Hey Kelly,
I'm happy you get this chance to stay home with your girls! It's been a very hard transition for me, but worth it. No one will do a better job at raising your children than you. My advice: get out of the house, go to MUGG or any group you can find. It will help you NOT go crazy. =)

LeslieJerkins said...

SO excited for you Kel, and I know the girls are too! I love reading your thought processes...keep em coming through this process and POST PICTURES!

Jill said...

Kelly, I am so proud of you. It is a very hard and personal decision on what to do. I can tell you that as a mom of kids already in school that you will never ever regret giving yourself these days with those sweet babies. The time goes way too fast and no matter how much you want it, you just can't get it back. These are the days that will warm your heart when you are old like me. If you ever need a break let me know, I think they are amazing babies and am so overwhelmingly thankful that God led you and Steven to being their parents. It is the happy ending I wish every story had!

melanie said...

Schepp...you are going to be the best YOU, and wife and mama no matter what you decide to do (SAHM or not). I know you have decided...but I mean if you go back. And you will be that SAHM that is NOT the exclusive one and is friends with everyone. You are the perfect one to bridge that gap. And as for poor...you may find it to be SO worth it. :) Just know you have several people to vent to no matter what (money, mom, etc). :) I wish I could be close and have playdates with you and your precious girls!! :)

Mitzi said...

Great post! Loved hearing from you. Enjoy these days! :)

Courtney said...

I am with ya on all that. It is easy to fall into place with everyone who is in your same situation (regardless of what situation that is) and we all need to be careful not forget how to relate to others who are not exactly like us.

Staying home can be just as much of a physical and mental strain as most jobs, but thankfully the reward for your toil is far greater. This is coming from someone who has one that is not even walking yet! I cannot imagine how much more work your two beautiful little fireballs are right now!

I love you guys and look forward to hanging out this summer!

ashley said...

i support you 100% and look forward to your thoughts on this journey and what it does mean for you and your fam. i love you for YOU and even as that is always changing you are an example for me!!!

Andews said...

So you're a full-time mom right now! There is no place like home. Retirement allows people to enjoy life a li'l bit more. It's good to have fun, especially if you're with your family!

Andews Hayes